An Honest Conversation

I tend to latch onto a handful of songs at a time and listen to them over and over again until I get tired of them. Sometimes I feel guilty about it, like I'm indulging in an extra scoop of ice cream, and I try to pace myself, but I always end up doing the same thing: listening to the same three songs on repeat until they're worn thin. It's never more than five songs and no less than two. They are songs that just catch me in some way, that I connect with on some level. Sometimes the words are exactly what I'm thinking, sometimes I just like the way the words sound strung together, their juxtaposition. It could be the rhythm, or that it sounds exactly like sunshine or a moody grey day. Sometimes they're brooding, but always they're meaningful.

These are the songs that characterize periods in my life, that can't possibly be separated from certain memories. Spring semester was extremely stressful, marked with periods of peace while driving in the early summer heat or sitting in the sun. The three songs that sounded like sunshine and tiredness were Jon Foreman's cover of "Boxing" (originally by Ben Folds Five), "Champagne Supernova" by Oasis, and "Praise You" by Fatboy Slim. My first semester was exhausting and I listened to Counting Crows' Across A Wire disc one on repeat while I took naps. Senior year was "Hey There Delilah" by the Plain White T's and driving to design class.

This is the reason I'm always a bit hesitant whenever someone asks what kind of music I listen to. I'm starting to hone in on a general genre that I like, but mostly I just attach myself to a group of songs and don't let go until I'm done, and I'd rather not tell a perfect stranger what they are. They aren't just songs that I can tap my foot to, they are a little part of me, capturing a specific thought or a frame of mind. That's the funny thing about songs, the expected honesty and freedom in them. Jon Foreman has said that he marvels at this, how it's expected that you will speak honestly of the most personal things that you couldn't bring up in an everyday conversation. You put a little piece of yourself into chords and notes and lyrics and then you hand it out, and everyone who listen, who connects with it, finds a bit of themselves it it, an honesty and a truth. And that's not something I'm going to discuss with the bored extrovert sitting next to me before class.

The songs that are playing in my ear right now are:
Murder in the City - The Avett Brothers
Worn Me Down - Rachael Yamagata
Jealous of the Moon - Nickel Creek
June on the West Coast - Bright Eyes